Baby It’s Cold Outside — Donald Trump Won’t Leave the White House Edition

EWE
2 min readNov 22, 2020

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I really can’t stay? (No. You lost)

I don’t wanna go away (That’s for a jury to decide)

These four years have been (The longest of my life)

The greatest in history (Why anyone voted for you is a mystery)

Melania is going to leave me (That’s because you’re pervy)

My father exploited the poor (Let me walk you to the door)

I’m really not in a hurry (Ooh, look at the snow flurries)

Maybe just a few days more (Seriously there’s the door)

My lawyers think (The BS is bad out there)

Mail-in voting stinks. (There was no fraud out there)

I wish I knew how (Your lies are upsetting me now)

To break the law (I’ll get your comb, your hair looks well….)

I say no, no, no sir (The Secret Service brought a taser)

At least I’m gonna say that I tried (I really enjoy hurting your pride)

I really can’t stay? (No. Go away)

Hey, it’s cold outside

Ah, you’re very pushy you know?

I like to think of it as democratic

I simply won’t go (The army is just outside)

The answer is no (Really, they’re right outside)

The presidency has been (A chance for you to cash in)

A way for me to perform (Look out the window at that storm)

Ivanka’s lips are delicious (Ewe, that’s none of my business)

Don Jr. is dumb as a rock (That doesn’t come as a shock)

My bankers will be vicious (Your accounting is suspicious)

Well maybe just a Diet Coke more (Never seen such a blizzard before)

This is my home (It’s going to be hard out there)

They say I’m the GOAT (Really, really hard out there)

I can give you a hundred grand (Your finances are out of hand)

But don’t you see? (Joe Biden got to 270)

This is a fake news conspiracy (If I were you I would flee)

At least I can run again (Not if you're serving seven to ten)

I really want to stay (Time to get the taser)

Baby, it’s cold

Baby it’s cold outside

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EWE
EWE

Written by EWE

Dad. Husband. Writer. Dork.

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